Episode 12: Perfectionism, Stones, and Self Love: Ben's Story
Ben did not enter into this conversation lightly. He came prepared, with notes, and a book to read from. We had a couple of conversations before recording. He mapped out the things he felt ready to share for recording, and knew his boundaries of what he didn't. I admire this kind of thoughtfulness, and is something he brings to a lot of arenas in his life: intention.
I benefit from this modeling of how to approach a project, because I tend to operate on the fly a bit more than I'd like to admit. Sometimes wandering headfirst into things is the best way to get started, akin to diving into cold water rather than a one toe, one inch at a time tactic. But often, a little foresight and planning goes a long way. As evidenced by this conversation, which was insightful, playful, and wove together several big life themes. That ability to zoom in and zoom out, seeing the big picture and the small intimate details is a gift that only comes from someone who has practiced both. Ben's a teacher, so perhaps his training as an educator also grants him this ability.
We met at a park to record, sat on a blanket on the grass on a breezy late summer day. This idea was also Ben's, a response to the dreaded zoom fatigue, the exhaustion of so many connections happening over the computer screen. While we both admitted to fear of revealing our imperfection, this was a great test of that for both of us. I know that the audio quality is slightly affected in my efforts to reduce the wind sound, and there are moments that birds, cars, planes, and other park-goers enter our conversation. But I kind of like it. It makes the whole thing feel more human, less sterile of a process. Something to consider moving forward.
I mention in a few places that I am not unaware of the large gap between episodes, and I know that grad school, among other life responsibilities, has kept me busy. I am still committed to the project, and am planning on recording another interview soon. Stay tuned.
Piano music by Jeff Buckingham
Interlude from Free Music Archive: Lullaby for Democracy, by Doctor Turtle